Marije Vogelzang’s 10 ways to host a Christmas dinner like a badass jingle bell

Dutch pioneer & Eating Designer Marjie Vogelzang shares her insights on how to create the (im)perfect supper during the festive season.

1. always invite strangers. 

Yes, social anxiety is a thing but stepping over the fear and actually connecting with someone new and listening to new perspectives can be one of the greatest joys in life.

2. Do something that makes no sense.

For some reason, most people behave perfectly according to the apparently all-agreed-on- rules of Christmas dinners. Which, in essence, don’t really make a lot of sense in the first place.  Why not start with dessert, eat under the table or wrapped in blankets on the rooftop while chanting Christmas carols to passers-by?
 

3. Don’t overcomplicate things.

Christmas dinners are synonymous for nervous breakdowns related to perfect dishes, Michelin star-level service and impeccable styling. If that’s your wet dream: go for it!

If it’s not, don’t sweat. Just loosen up and do what makes you feel excited. If it excites you to roast sausages in the fireplace, just do it. If it excites you to eat at Mc Donalds in a Santa suit while spelling ‘MERRY CHRISTMAS’ in French fries: Do it! But: do it well, do it when you are genuinely excited, do it all the way.

4. Portion size - hunger - saturation

The largest part of the world lives in the mode of over-saturation. As a host, you might want to spoil your guests which is a natural tendency but as we are already stuffed, adding more stuff to the stuffness creates morbid suffocation. As a host, think about how to balance portions just as a composer makes a musical piece. The pauses are part of the music. Flavour is more expressive when it is eaten from desire and desire is created by cravings which occur during moments of absence.

5. Don’t eat mindless meat: Choose to eat meat if you have a good reason for it.

Jonathan Safran Foer dedicated a fair part of his book ‘Eating Animals’ to the topic of: what do we eat at Christmas dinner when we are vegetarians? Given how scarce food used to be, eating a large chunk of meat at a festive occasion makes sense. Choosing meat just because you don’t really know what else to do, not as a conscious choice, makes you lose points on the badass-host-scale.

 6. Skip the cliche’s: Presence over presents.

Wow! Christmas is so incredibly full of cliches that one might start to think it is about decoration, trees, presents and food. It’s sometimes hard to keep your eye on the essence through all of that clutter.

You can rigorously mess around with decoration, food, presents and reindeers, but whatever you do, just keep the “why” in mind. If you don’t believe in Jesus H Christ, focus on the part of human connection, spending time and attention together. The true and rare luxuries of our time. 

7. Give guests the wrong names

If you host a larger party where many people have never met, name cards or corsages with names can be very useful, but wouldn’t it be nice to be called ‘Carol’ or ‘Henry’ for a night while your actual name is Suzan? A dinner party is actually a performance or a small social experiment so what can you do to change people’s experience and perspective for one night?

8. Create a ritual in a world of meaningless consumption

As Christmas is obviously a Christian feast with some pagan influences, the traditional rituals are derived from a religious framework. As many people still celebrate Christmas but do not believe in a traditional God anymore, the celebration tends to erode into an empty gathering of consumption. Rituals are ways for humans to connect to their higher spiritual values and help to make sense of life. As a host, this is your chance to create and implement new rituals and to give a contemporary shape and depth to what we celebrate.

9. Involve guests

We’ve all been to some boring dinners in the past! So how about Involving guests to actively participate in the making and the serving of the dinner, or even providing the entertainment? This can infuse energy into the event while making life easier for the host.

10. Don’t take things too seriously or too personally.

There are many days in the year but when winter comes (in the northern hemisphere) it seems as if time only evolves around the days of Christmas and stress levels rise together with the accumulation of Christmas songs on the radio. WTF?! Who cares if things aren’t perfect? Who cares if your neighbour was pissed off because you forgot this years gift, even though you gave her an amazing one last year? Instead of feeling frustrated about things that you would like to change just look around to see and appreciate all the wonderful things you do have. (Fuck we have FOOD! How incredible is that!?) If something unexpected happens (your dog ate the Christmas pudding you’ve been slaving on for weeks or your child vomited on grandma’s luxury purse) Just smile and say ‘What a beautiful stories for future Christmases!‘.

Because that’s what people will remember about your party. They might like the food and the setting but they will remember the emotion and the story. 

To learn more about Marije Vogelzang check out her profile on our website.